You will have noticed that there have been no entries for ages... We've been in Stockholm, caring for my terminally ill mother-in-law and as well as there being no time to spare, there is no internet access at her home.

However, she was admitted to a palliative care facility in Älvsjö yesterday afternoon. She's not coming home. Ever.

The doctors have stopped treatment for her stomach tumour which has taken them by surprise by growing at an alarming rate. After all of their assurances that it wouldn't grow etc, this was a bolt out of the blue and makes me wonder if they have any clue what they are doing.

The timeline they have given us, indicates she will die soon. Certainly before the summer. How sad that she will miss the birth of her first great grandchild.

So we are off home. We'll pop up to Stockholm for a few days each week and start packing up her apartment and visiting her at the hospice, but our time as carers is now over. So far, since coming here just before Christmas, she's also had a pneumonia attack, three urinary tract infections and a bout of thrush, plus her pressure wound is really inflamed again. She has been bedridden and in a great deal of pain and discomfort. Thus the need to move her somewhere so they can care for her full time and most importantly, they will be able to stabilise her pain medication.

It will be good to be in our own space again, though the waiting is going to be tough. I know she's been at death's door several times before, so I live in hope, but looking at her this morning tormented with pain, doped up to the eyeballs and barely aware, I can't help thinking that her time has come.

Each day we have her is a bonus at this stage, though I feel split in some ways - it’s a sad time to say a final goodbye to those you love but at the same time, it's just as hard and sad to see them suffering. I hope for all the situation resolves itself quickly one way or the other.