When a life ends it is always a time for thought and reflection, a sad time, a time to mourn, but also a time to celebrate a person's life and to care for those left behind. It is a time to try to fill an empty space that is yawning wide open, a space vacated by a person who just a short time ago was living, breathing, fighting against a disease that was relentlessly taking them away.

I learned recently that my former mother in law in Adelaide passed away peacefully in late September. There is so much I could write about this lovely woman, but I’d rather not write the details here publicly. However, I can tell you that my mother-in-law was a good person, who always put other people first. She was loving, selfless and always gracious and kind. I am sorry that she has suffered through such a long illness. She is beyond suffering now, and I am glad for that alone.

Riposa i pace, mama.

Last week we visited the cemetery to see the memorial stone that has finally come back from the stonemason. It was a timely visit as it coincided with the All Saint's day holiday.




In Sweden as I mentioned before, we don't have Halloween as is celebrated in North America. We also don't have Thanksgiving, but I think that perhaps last weekend's Alla helgona (All Saints' Day) serves a similar function, even though it is not the same origin.

In Australia, it is not a holiday and in fact All Saints' Day is viewed as a Catholic tradition. In Sweden however, Alla helgona is not necessarily seen as religious, but rather as a day to remember those loved one's we've lost as well as being a celebration of your family and an occasion to gather for a shared meal.





I always find this day just beautiful. At dusk, clusters of families including small children, go to the cemetery bringing candles, flowers and simple wreaths made with pine cones and sprays of conifer leaves. The graves are visited and the loved one remembered. The cemetery overflows with candles and flowers. As you walk through, there are often so many candles that they glow like twinkling stars guiding you. The only time it is more beautiful is on Christmas Eve, when these magical lights are reflected in the glistening snow. Back home you continue the remembrance, but also simply enjoying being together. Stillness.

It has been a really tough year for my family. We have spent many hours trying to console and support each other in the family. I feel a sort of helplessness because old age and illness come to us all in the end. We have to accept it. But it is not easy when it comes so close to home.